


My Bedroom Computer Light is the Only Menace to My New Faux Wooden Blinds

by orphan_account



Series: 2nd POV Drabbles [4]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Skype
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-11
Updated: 2015-07-11
Packaged: 2018-04-08 19:26:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4316901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>2009!Phan realising they're in love</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Bedroom Computer Light is the Only Menace to My New Faux Wooden Blinds

**Author's Note:**

> hahahha the title is longer than the fic itself......

He’s typing right now, freaking out over your description of love. You don’t know what to tell him. You tell him you know and you understand, and you do on some levels, but it’s not the same. You tell him it’ll go away, but you know how hard it is to fall out of love. You know it’s not going to be easy, but you say it anyways because he is your friend and you want him to feel okay even though you know he doesn’t.

He tells you he doesn’t know what to do, and the problem is that you don’t know either. You wish you could be there for him, to hug him and tell him everything will be okay, but you can’t. These are the moments that make you hate this friendship because you feel so much but you can’t properly convey it into words so you just write it down like this.

He’s realising he’s fallen in love with his best friend and even though you’re smiling, you feel horrible. You just keep up the act though, keep up the fake front of smiles even though he can’t even see you and you’re just lying to yourself. It’s just a way of telling yourself it’ll be okay, and you hope that he can feel that too somehow.

He can’t.

He tells you he’s okay and you want to believe him because you hope he is, but you’re not sure if you can. You can’t be sure of it, because you can’t see him and god you want to go to the other side of the country but you can’t. You know he isn’t okay though, not really, because realising you’re in love is one thing but also knowing your feelings aren’t reciprocated is another.

It hurts. It’s a physical ache, like a thousand knifes stabbing into your heart over and over again until you become numb to the pain and get used to it. It still draws tears from your eyes though until you’re desperate for it to stop.

That’s firsthand experience. That’s why you know he isn’t okay.

He says he’s going to leave for a few seconds, just to breathe and he promises he’ll come back. The last thing he tells you before he goes it ‘I love you’, which makes you worry even more because he only says that when you’re not okay or he’s not okay. You send an 'I love you too’ back but he doesn’t read it and it makes you anxious , because what if he does something stupid? You know he’s not going to, but he might and that thought is scary enough on its own.

You breathe a sigh of relief when he answers you again but you don’t know what to tell him again. You’re speechless, helpless, staring at the pixels of your laptop screen, wishing you could see through them but you can’t.

You hope this’ll be okay, that he’ll be okay eventually.

You don’t know if you’ll be though, because the tears streaming down your face are because you just realised you’re in love with him.

**Author's Note:**

> tell me which pov you think this was in ^^


End file.
